Hello There, Guest! • Register

It Snowed Last Night

by Graneepi - 13 Dec 2018, 01:16 PM in Shitposting General
Nov 2018
Two Years of Service
Posted: 13 Dec 2018, 01:16 PM
8:00 am: I made a snowman.
8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman.
8:15 - So, I made a snow woman.
8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women everywhere.
8:20 - The gay couple living nearby threw a hissy fit and moaned it could have been two snow men instead.
8:22 - The transgender man..women...person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.
8:25 - The vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to decorate snow figures with.
8:28 - I was being called a racist because the snow couple is white.
8:30 - I used food coloring to make one of the snow couple a different color and be more racially inclusive.
8:37 - Accused of using black face on the snowman...snowpersons.
8:39 - The middle eastern gent across the road demanded the snow woman be covered up .
8:40 - The police arrived saying someone had been offended.
8:42 - The feminist neighbor complained again that the broomstick of the snow woman needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.
8:43 - The council equality officer arrived and threatened me with eviction.
8:45 - TV news crew from ABC showed up. I was asked if I know the difference between snowmen and snow-women? I replied "Snowballs" and am now called a sexist.
9:00 - I was on the news as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, and sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during difficult weather.
9:10 - I was asked if I have any accomplices. My children were taken by social services.
9:29 - Far left protesters offended by everything marched down the street demanding for me to be arrested.
9:45 - The boss called and fired me because of the negative association with work that had been all over social media.
10:00 - I cry into my drink because all I wanted to do was build a snowman...
Moral: There is no moral to this story. It is what this world has become because of a bunch of snowflakes.
Sad that this is what it's come to.
Feels good to be back  Aww
Eeeh? Nani?
Eeeh? Nani?
Sep 2015
Guy with the stick
Five Years of Service
Posted: 13 Dec 2018, 02:12 PM
I don't regret much in life, but oh boy I sure do regret reading this post.
[Image: HAi23xg.png]
"The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek."

1 Guest(s)